Five Questions With: Nicole McLaughlin

The holiday season can often be a stressful time. Nicole McLaughlin, neuropsychology clinical director and director of psychiatric neurosurgery at Butler Hospital, spoke with Providence Business News about how to manage stress at this time of year. PBN: What are some techniques that can be used to reduce the stress of the holiday season? MCLAUGHLIN: You should prioritize tasks you need to get done and tasks that bring you joy, but don't overburden yourself. Remember that it's OK to ask for help and delegate tasks to ease your stress levels. It's also important to create a plan/schedule/task list of activities - and make sure they are manageable. With our day-to-day responsibilities balancing work and home life, people also need to remember that it's important to take time for themselves. Continuing exercise and relaxation routines and making sure you are getting enough sleep is another key way to reduce stress during the holidays. Also, try to let go of the need to be perfect and be willing to say "no." PBN: What mental health issues tend to come up during the holiday season and why? MCLAUGHLIN: Although the holidays can be a time of great joy, they can also be stressful for anyone. There are often many tasks that need to be completed, and many people are traveling. Family members may become more irritable when they feel overwhelmed. In addition, holidays can bring up recollections of loved ones, potentially those who have passed away or those who cannot be here for the holidays, which can bring on feelings of sadness. Particularly in the Northeast U.S., there is less daylight, and the weather is getting colder during the holiday season, which can contribute to seasonal affective concerns as well. Stress typically exacerbates any preexisting psychiatric difficulties, including anxiety, depression, post-traumatic stress, substance use, and other mental health concerns. PBN: How can someone say "no" to something without guilt? MCLAUGHLIN: This can be very difficult, particularly if you are a person who likes to please others and strives for perfectionism. However, this is an important skill to have, and saying "no" can be healthy. This allows you to prioritize the most important activities and tasks for your personal values. Reducing the number of tasks you have increases your ability to practice self-care, which is important all of the time but particularly during busy times such as the holidays. Trust your choice, and be kind; if you would like to, offer a potential other solution or alternative with which you are comfortable. Those who love and respect you will always understand that you cannot say "yes" all of the time. PBN: What is the best way to set realistic holiday expectations? MCLAUGHLIN: Decide what tasks and activities are most important for you this holiday season and be realistic about what can be accomplished. Remember to choose tasks that align with your personal and family values, not just a need to make things "perfect" for everyone else - and accept that not everything will be perfect. Also, be sure to communicate well with family and friends about plans and activities and set boundaries when needed. PBN: What are some time management strategies that can be used around the holidays to reduce stress? MCLAUGHLIN: Create a plan of tasks that need to be completed and activities that you/your family plan on participating in, and make sure your expectations are realistic. Start early, so you have plenty of time to get everything done. Come up with a concrete schedule that lays out all tasks. Don't be afraid to delegate/ask for help. Include some time for relaxation and rest in your plans, both during and after the holidays. Katie Castellani is a PBN staff writer. You may contact her at [email protected].